Top 5 Red flags you should look for when dating a girl

You might think you are dating ‘the one,’ but before deciding on that, you might want to make sure that you are not overlooking anything. Although your friends love her, if you feel like something is wrong, you might want to take things into perspective so that you can properly figure out why you feel the way you do. To give you an idea about this, below are some of the red flags you should look for when dating a girl, as well as ways to deal with it. 

Top 5 red flags you should notice 

Dating is fun when it is healthy, but sometimes, some people are just walking red flags, and some people are just too stuck with their rose-colored glasses that they can barely see it. Thus, below are some of the top red flags that you should notice so that you can get out of the relationship as soon as possible. 

Criticisms 

While it is okay to criticize a person you love, it is limited. There is also a huge difference between just complaining and criticizing a person. All person has been subjected to criticism, and it hurts when it comes from the person we love. However, it is normal to do this now because we are human. We have the right to our emotions and feel the way we do. However, if you feel like you are always being criticized and that your girl is doing it on purpose, then that is a completely different topic. You should not allow yourself to be a punching bag and tolerate all the criticisms thrown at you, especially if it makes you lose your self-esteem. You want to make sure that you are being treated right in a relationship, so be sure to look out for this. 

Defensive

You are your person, and you should know that owning up to your mistakes is the right thing to do. However, if you are dating someone who does not know how to use the word sorry or apologize to you, then this might be something you ought to focus on. You cannot be blamed every time they make a mistake, nor should you tolerate them not apologizing for the things they did wrong. Not being able to apologize or own up to their mistakes reflects on them and not on you. This is a huge red flag that you need to notice as soon as possible so that you do not suffer in the long run of things.

Refusing to engage

When you have a problem that you know needs to be discussed between the two of you, it is important to sit down and talk. The problem comes when the girl you are dating suddenly refuses to engage with you or, rather, is stonewalling you. Evading to participate in problem-solving in your relationship is a huge red flag. This means they are not in the right headspace or the right place to participate in the discussion. This can also mean that they are not ready for a relationship in the first place. You want to consider if they are actually committed to dating you if you notice this happening all the time. 

Need for constant reassurance

While this might seem a little mean, it is nothing but the truth. You do not want a girlfriend whose happiness depends on you. It is normal to ask for reassurances every now and then but to keep asking for it consistently can get very draining on you as well. You are going to sacrifice your willpower and time trying to reassure them that you love them when you are doing your best to show them. It is very unfair, and you should consider this a red flag. You need someone who knows how to be happy on their own and shares happiness with you. Unless they happen to be going under some bad circumstances at the moment, you might want to look into this.

Talking with the ex

While it is okay to be friends with your exes, talking consistently with your ex is entirely something else. If the girl you are dating keeps on speaking with her ex, this is a huge red flag that should tell you she is not over her ex. You want to make sure to date someone who is no longer attached to someone else. You do not want to end up being the rebound, so you ought to think about this thoroughly and look for signs regarding if they are doing it a lot or if it is actually just a friendly and occasional conversation. 

Ways to deal with red flags in your relationship

If you have recognized the red flags in your relationship, you might be wondering what you can do now. You do not want to blame yourself for this as it is completely not your fault. Instead, you want to make sure that you will be able to handle things well so that you would not end up broken because of something toxic.

Be rational 

Instead of having to waste emotional energy worrying whether or not your girlfriend thinks you are doing the right thing, what you should do is reflect on the relationship and yourself. You want to take a moment to fully analyze the situation so that you can make a rational decision. Once you have decided, make sure that you stick with it, no matter how much it might hurt you at first. If you think this is the right thing to do, even if it means breaking up with them, you should do it for your peace.

Learn to be happy alone 

Just like you should not be with a person who keeps asking for constant reassurance from you, you should learn how to be happy without the other person. This can be pretty painful at first, but if you do your best, you should be able to figure it out. It is something that will pay off and will allow you to be free of any chains that might be holding you down. It also frees you of any drama and chaos in the duration of your relationship.

Know your limits

If you want your girlfriend to treat you right, you must know how to set your boundaries and stick with them. You need to set what deal breakers are to you, and the moment they go overboard, you should not tolerate it. This is the same thing with dealing with red flags, the moment you see them; you should take action and ensure that you are not going to overlook them. You want the girl you are dating to show you respect and value, and this means giving you your personal space, the right amount of affection, and learning how to be happy on your own.

While red flags can be pretty hard to find when you have no idea what they are, now that you know, it should be easier. You are going to have to deal with these red flags if you want to eventually find the best type of relationship there is. By knowing them and how to deal with these red flags, you will learn how to love yourself better and find someone who can love you best. 




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